Kruah and Hipol
by DJay32
Summary: Meet Kruah. He's a genuine Space Pirate worker. He just wants to get paid and get done. Meet Hipol. He's the smart one. Now's not the best time to be working in the mines, you see. The Hunter is said to be roaming around. But where else is there to go?
1. First Desciples

"Weather forecast:," a Space Pirate civillian spoke in alien tongue, "Command Center still experiencing constant acid rain showers! Will it end? Followers of the Great One say 'No.'"  
Some of the workers groan as they hear this from the comm link.  
"You know, this station jumped the screechbat when those Phazon Followers started taking over," one worker screeched.  
"Tell me somethin' I DON'T know," another agreed.

"Hey, can you change the station? I want to listen to the surgery status on our commander."  
"Huh? Oh, sure," the first worker reached over to the radio and was instantly shot. He screamed in pain as he drew his arm back, screaming at the spot where the hand used to be.  
A Space Pirate militia had entered the mine shaft and shot him.  
"What did you.... I mean, he was only trying to--"  
"Next time, that will be your head. You want to hear the news on your commander? I'll TELL you the news: he's up and ready to slaughter any enemies that come here!"  
"Hey, hang on, you're just a militia! This place is for Troopers and higher!"  
The militia shined a bright glow and quickly changed shape to that of a woman.  
"Just a militia, huh? Get back to work, slacker," she snarled and left.  
Moments passed before the injured pirate fainted, and the rest of the workers glanced at him, then worked twice as fast.

Meanwhile, Meta-Ridley, commander of the Space Pirates, was just recovering from surgery.  
"Status report: armor at 100%, chest injury 74% recovered. I'm sorry, sir, but we couldn't completely heal your mark," a pirate sadly announced.  
Ridley looked around and shook his head, still recovering from the anaesthesia. He felt stronger.  
"You may be wondering why you feel so strange, sir. Well, we have managed to successfully upgrade you. You are no longer Meta-Ridley, and are now Omega Ridley."  
The large dragon slowly got up, and demanded to know what he needs to do.  
"Um... I believe the desciples stated the Great One has transferred the Seed from Phaaze. I believe they also said the Galactic Federation is coming to destroy the Seed. I suppose they are saying someone should defend it."  
Knowing his mission, Ridley took to the skies and made his post in the Leviathan Seed.  
Let's join in on the Pirates working in the Phazon Mines.  
"Phew, I'm getting kinda tired..." one said to the others.  
"Yeah? Well, Mistress Gandrayda might come back to make us look like him!" Another replied, gesturing to the injured one with a missing hand.  
"Right, of course," the first sighed. A few seconds later, he continued. "Hey, who else hates the First Desciples?"  
"Quiet down, will ya? You never know who might be watching..." a worker nervously said.  
"I'm just asking."  
"....yeah, I hate them, too."  
"...always bossing us around..."  
"...they say they discovered the Great One. I betcha that's a load o' propaganda! How much do you wanna bet that the Great One doesn't even exist, huh? They always talk about how 'the Great One is great,' and 'the Great One gave us phazon...'... BLECH!"  
"And... and what about that Seed?"  
"Oh, don't get me started on the Seed! That big ol' thing? Just a warehouse with a Transit Station next to it! They probably just did some paint jobs on it before taking it to the Homeworld."  
"Hey, whatcha guys talkin' about?"  
"Don't tell miss Gandrayda or any of the First Desciples this, but... we're ranting about how the First Desciples brought utter hell to our planet."  
"Really? Utter hell? How?"  
"For one thing, they took over our government and military. And against the 'Feds,' we're nothing without those."  
"I see your point. So, why do you think the Desciples got so... stupid?"  
"Phazon, definitely phazon. After all, thir ship ws going straight to Aether, which is FULL of it. They probably just got corrupted or something. Y'know... phazon in the brain. Except theirs was probably... I dunno, SUPER phazon or something, which spared their lives but messed up their minds."  
"I see. Basically, too much exposure to phazon?"  
"Yeah. Their heads are full of it. And, hey, what about that Gandrayda, huh? Isn't she something?"  
"...'something'? What do you mean?"  
"You know, a Bryyonian. Her head's got more rocks than Bryyo!"  
"What makes you say that?"  
"Well, first of all, she used to work for the 'Feds,' and we're natural enemies, remember? And the morphing gig? What is the freakin' deal, lady? Take last Tuesday, for example! There I was, in the Research Facility, mindin' my own, when I bumped into a Commando! At least, it looked like a commando, so I quietly walked away. Then, I realized that the commando was blocking the way to where I was going! Before I had a chance to yell, the Commando just... transformed into a freakin' LADY! A naked lady, standing RIGHT THERE, where I needed to go! I mean, WHAT'S THE DEAL, freak? You hear me?"  
"Oh, I hear you. Like the time she shot your head clean off for disrespecting a commander?"  
"Yeah, I mean-- huh?"  
So, the new Pirate shifted into the form of Mistress Gandrayda, and shot the worker's head off. She proceeded to mock him.  
"I mean, what's the deal with that? Jerk needs to learn respect."  
She looks at the other workers, who are all staring in fear. "...what are you doing standing around? Get to work!" and with that, she left.  
Days had passed since these events, and Ridley was growing bored of waiting. He contacted some Space Pirates, demanding a status report.  
"Status checks in all clear, sir. ....mostly," the Pirate reported. Ridley asked about the 'mostly' part, and got quite an answer.  
"Well, sir, it turns out our projects with the Great One have gone... bad. The Seeds planted in Bryyo and Elysia have been.... destroyed. By Samus Aran. Defending our Leviathan is of the utmost importance, sir."  
Ridley was satisfied, if not shocked, by this news, and requested to learn all the news on this ongoing war. Hours later, he recieved more info.  
"Um... that foul bounty hunter, Samus Aran.... she's... coming. She knows where we are. She knows of the Seed. What she DOESN'T know, however, is that we'll have everything, and I mean everything put into high security. Even the Mistress is preparing for this. We even have a diabolical plot being rehearsed about how Samus will get to Gandrayda! She'll think the Mistress is a GF Soldier being shot by some of the men, but really they're purposefully missing. We shall give you more news as it comes, sir."  
Later, in the Research Facility, Gandrayda discovers that Samus had arrived and encountered the deadly acid rain. So, she morphed into the form of a GF soldier, hacked into Samus' comm link, and requested a 'rescue'  
"All right, you Pirates, remember: I'll be behind this crate, and you'll be pretending to shoot me. Just... don't actually SHOOT me, all right? Hurry, I hear her coming!"  
So, they 'gave fire' towards the 'GF soldier,' and when Samus walked in and shot one, they had a short fight. In the end, Samus 'saved' the 'GF soldier,' and 'he' helped her up an elevator.  
Yes, this is it! The moment when I get to fulfill my promise to the Great One! Oh, Dark Samus... it looks like I WILL get to present Aran's bloody helmet to you.  
Back in the Phazon Mines, there are but two Space Pirate workers left. They work as hard as they can, and eventually get tired.  
"Don't stop now! (pant) ....miss.... miss Gandrayda might kill us!" one worringly says. Suddenly, the radio gives a special broadcast.  
"THIS IS A SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN! Mistress Gandrayda, the deadly electro-shapeshifter, has just been murdered by the foul Samus Aran! Recent reports stated that Samus is heading towards the Mining area! Any Pirates there, either stand your ground and attempt to stop this ruthless monster, or evacuate immediately!"  
A moment of gasping follows this, then silence. The Pirates suddenly hear screaming and shooting coming from the hallway behind them.  
"Dude... this is gonna hurt," one worker quietly said.  
"Hold on... isn't there a way out of this place?" The other replied.  
"Well, yeah, but we'd have to dodge that Phazon Harvester Death Beam thing. You know we're not that agile!"  
"Do what you want, I'm making a break for it!" And with that, the second worker dashed to the Harvester's room, then immediately stopped. "(whispering) Uh... this may not be the best tactic, but... you may want to hide in the corner."  
"(also whispering) Why?"  
"Samus... is entering... the Phazon Harvester's.... room...."  
"Aw, shi--"  
The Pirate's speech is cut short by sounds of the harvester firing. The two looked at each other with fear, and quickly hid in different corners.  
Oh, crap, we are definitely gonna die, no doubt about it... one thought as he saw two metal legs enter the room. The bounty hunter looked around, and turned her Scan Visor on. She could easily see two Space Pirates in corners of the room, and scanned them.  
Scanning.... Scan complete. Biology: Space Pirate Worker. Workers are completely harmless, if not good with power tools. They can easily get a big ego if you don't just shoot the hell out of their hands to show them who's boss.  
Seconds passed, which felt like hours to the terrified workers. Suddenly, Samus slowly walked out of the room.  
"Hey... she... she didn't kill us! Heh... she must've seen us and ran home, scared."  
Without a warning, Samus activated a new program which allowed her to understand the Pirate language, and listened to the bragging, not surprised.  
"Yeah, she probably noticed my "tri's" and "bi's." I've been working out."  
"Oh, and I'll bet she realized how big my intillect is and decided not to mess with me. Yeah, that scared little runt! Why, if she were to come back in here, I'll give her a run for her money! Yeah, she'll be so scared, she'll wet her pant--"  
All of a sudden, Samus jumped back in, 'shot the hell out of their hands,' and slowly walked away as they screamed in pain.  
"WHAT THE HELL WAS WITH THAT!?"  
"I DON'T KNOW!"  
"DUDE, THAT HURT!"  
"I KNOW!"  
"THIS HURTS SO BAD, OW OW OW OW OW! AAAAHHHH!!!"  
So, Samus walked away, satisfied.

A few minutes passed before the workers decided to go to a healing station and recover.  
"Dude...... that.... was.... scary."  
"Tell me about it..."  
"I almost choked on my lunch!"  
"I almost lost my lunch!"  
"Okay... okay... let's calm down... the pain's not so bad now."  
"But, what are we gonna do? We can't just let that... that... killing machine walk around the Homeworld with no warning!"  
"Yeah, but... what can we do? She could easily kill us!"  
"Dunno... let's see if the radio can tell us anything," and the worker turned on the radio.

"BRRRREAKING NEWS! Studies show that the damsel of distress, Samus Aran, has developed some kind of immunity to our hazardous precipitation! Simply put: our acid rain doesn't hurt her anymore. We have one of the First Disciples here to adress us on this, as well as some other popular concerns."

"Why, thank you. Greetings! I am Xeloy, one of the crew of the Colussus who learned the ways of the Great One. The Great One knows all... she is the One Free Woman. Anyhoo, the great Dark Samus has adressed us, the First Disciples, about events of the future. First and foremost: the acid rain. She had predicted Samus stealing secret technology from our very own labs! But THAT'S NOT ALL... recent reports show that she has delved into our mining facilities! This proves the Great One correct even more! She predicted Samus going into the mines and stealing highly protected weaponry. There is, in fact, a highly protected weapon in the mines, currently named the Nova Beam, title pending."

"But not to worry! News Anchorpirate here, saying that the Nova Beam really is highly protected! Normally, it has many locks and gizmos protecting it, and even now, scientists have developed a vacuum which can easily eliminate Samus! Well, it's not really a vacuum, but it can kill ANYONE who enters the field. As well, when Commander Ridley learned of the oncoming and ongoing threat, he ordered a whole squadron of our highest ranked Space Pirates to ambush this monstrosity!"

"There, see? Not even the Evil One can make it past all THAT!"

The workers are relieved to hear this, and sigh. Then, alarm noises and busy chatter are heard on the radio.

"Wha... what's this? ....yeah, uh huh.... GASP! I have just been informed that--"

"WAIT. Let me guess. Samus did exactly what we were hoping she wouldn't, right? Face it, that's what you're trying to say."

"Well, not exactly, but.... yes."

"Eeyuh... but, not to worry! The Great One still made many predictions! She predicted that.... wait, WHAT? She... she predicted a full-scale invasion of our homeworld... aw, crap. She said that Samus was a bad omen. A sign that the Galactic Federation is coming. They're going to fight us... but we will fight back! We'll fight them in the streets! We'll fight them in the buildings! We'll fight them! We'll smite them! We will WIN! ....also, the Great One decided to make it clear: people, PRIME IS NOT A REAL PLANET. I don't know where the rumor was started, but the Great One came from Phaaze, idiots! There IS NO PRIME!"

The workers couldn't believe their ears, and started worrying.

"Okay, that's it, I'm leaving the Homeworld!"  
"But... where will we go?"  
"Somewhere where we will be forever safe from the Feds!"

So, the workers left and headed towards a mysterious planet, never to be heard from again.

....at least, that's what they hoped.


	2. New Homeworld

"Man, now THIS is the life!" one space pirate exclaimed.  
"You said it, dude," the other replied.  
The two Space Pirate workers had fled from the Pirate Homeworld to a new planet, but they had no idea which one.

"Hey, dude?"  
"Yuh-huh?"  
"Where are we?"  
".....uh.... I dunno. I think the ship has a galaxy map and GPS somewhere, but...."  
The two workers ran into their ship and activated the main computer. As the CPU pinpointed their exact location, the two workers' faces went from relaxed to horrified.

"THE CURRENT LOCATION IS..... UNKNOWN."

The first worker, whom we shall call 'Kruah,' rummaged through the dashboards and glove compartments.

The second worker, whom we shall call 'Hipol,' searched through the computer's databanks.

Neither one heard the noises coming from outside the ship. The noises of wild animals.

Kruah was searching for anything useful, like food, or binoculars, or ANYTHING.

Hipol was searching for just the galaxy they were in, or any news on the Pirate Homeworld, or ANYTHING.

The noises outside became a little louder.

"....whoa," Hipol mumbled. Kruah stopped looking, and glanced at Hipol, filled with curiosity.  
"What is it?"  
"It says here 'The Galactic Federation recently stole a leviathan straight from the Command Center.' The Feds just never give up, do they?"  
"Yeah, I hate them. Any luck finding out where we are?"  
"Nope. ....*click* .....HEY! I found something! We're in the SR388 system."  
"SR388 system? Never heard of it. What is it, a parking system?"  
"Says here that this system is far off the trading route."  
"In Space Pirate, please?"  
"The Feds'll never find us here."

The two workers grinned deviously, and ran outside, only to stop and gasp.  
Dozens of metroids are seen in the distance.

"Duuuude.... are we gonna die?"  
"Stay calm. We'll get outta this. In fact, I have an idea! Let's capture some o' these metroids, and pull some research on 'em!"  
"What good'll THAT do?"  
"You kidding? If we set up a large laboratory here, complete with THOUSANDS of metroids in stasis, then we'll call the Pirate command, and they'll come by, and we'll get a big promotion!"  
"GENIUS!"

So, Kruah (the "genius") spent some time on his hunting skills to capture a couple metroids, and put them in some of Hipol's custom-made pods.  
Well, by "custom-made," I mean "crappy."

A few days passed, and shockingly enough, no escapes were made by the poor little parasites.  
Hipol decided to take a walk, and enjoy the scenery. Walking along, he heard something rustling in the bushes, and got scared. Suddenly, a metroid flew out!

"YIKES!!" Hipol exclaimed. The metroid simply hovered in mid-air for a little, but Hipol kept screaming.  
"NOOO!!! SAVE ME!!! DON'T KILL ME, PLEASE!!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!"  
Eventually, he looked at the 'killer,' only to see it just idly floating.  
"Huh? You're.... what are you doing?" he asked it. The metroid inched closer to him, and he jumped back.  
This repeated for a while until Hipol tripped over a branch, and the metroid came a lot closer.  
After a minute of thinking, Hipol decided to get up.  
"Uh... are you... are you friendly?" he nervously asked it. The metroid did a responded with a random spin.  
"Does that mean 'yes?' ....*another spin*.... one spin for 'yes,' two for 'no.' *one spin* ...YAY!"

Kruah returned to searching through the glove compartments while Hipol was taking a stroll, and he suddenly heard noises coming from the phazon storage section of the ship.

"Um.... hello?" Kruah nervously asked. A groan came from the open door.  
Kruah slowly approached the door, and peeked inside.  
"Ugh....... my... HEAD..... aw, jeez, that hurts," said the voice from the room.  
A giant space pirate rises out of the piles of phazon, and holds its head.  
"Aren't you an Elite Pirate?" Kruah asked the giant figure.  
"Ruh? Oh, yeah, I'm a Space Pirate ELITE! That's right! And, uh... who the zoomer are YOU?"  
"I'm, uh... a Space Pirate worker. Code-named 'Kruah.'"  
"Worker, eh? Mind explaining what in the name o' Phendrana's goin' on here?"  
"Depends. Are you with the Ridley force?"  
"Ridley force? Norfair, no! I'm with the Kraid team."  
"Oh, good. Well, we kinda... stole a ship and fled to a planet in the SR388 system."  
"What is that, a parking system?"  
"I know, right?"  
"Hang on... 'we?'"  
"It's me and my colleague, whom I call 'Hipol.' He's taking a walk, or something."  
"I see."  
"And you?"  
"I was with my two best buds, then suddenly, BAM! Baseball bat to the back o' the head. Those punks ditched me to go fight in the war against the hunter."  
"...that's incredibly stupid of them."  
"Yeah, well... they ARE stupid."

Around this time, Hipol was returning to the ship.

"Kruah, I'm back, and I have something you'll never believe!" he shouted as he entered. He noticed the Elite Pirate, and stopped.  
"Yeah, uh... so do I," Kruah responded.  
Hipol asked, "Who's this?"  
The Elite Pirate responded, "Oh, I never introduced myself. The name's Space Pirate Elite Kappa, code-named 'Yesty.'"  
"So, Yesty.... I thought Project: Elite was completely scrapped. ...by the hunter, I mean," Hipol commented.  
"Actually, she only killed, like, five or six of us. I'm pretty sure Epsilon was the last she killed."  
"(Kruah) So, what was YOUR surpise, Hipol?"  
"(Hipol) Huh? Oh, right. I got a pet metroid! I call him 'Bitey.'"  
"(Kruah) HOLY CRAP!"  
"(Yesty) GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME!!!"  
"(Hipol) He's friendly! ....down, Bitey! DOWN! GET DOWN, BOY!!!"

After a little "house training," (or "rearranging a metroid's insides"......"with a gun") the three unlikely partners decide to do some more research on their surroundings.

Yesty, being the actual owner of the ship, quickly used the ship's databanks to discover their location as being the planet SR388.  
Kruah exclaimed, "Wait! I thought we were in the SYSTEM SR388!"  
Yesty replied, "Well, according to this thing, this planet was named because of the system, or something."  
Kruah thought for a few minutes, but didn't grasp the meaning very well. "Um...... o..ka..y..?"  
Hipol asked Yesty if there was any other information about the planet, and Yesty checked the computer.  
"Uhhh... the planet was discovered in the 2300s by some trader guys, or something. It's filled with acidic clouds, 'n crap, and is the home planet to the metroid."  
As Yesty said the last piece of information, all three slowly looked outside.

"Dude?" Kruah asked.  
"Yeah?" Hipol replied.  
"We're screwed, ain't we?"  
"Oh yeah. Oh-ho-ho-ho YEAH."  
Yesty butted in, "I bet we could make this place safe. We just need to, I dunno, make a shield to protect us."

Before ya know it, the three pirates were already working on a large shield.

Yesty walked up to Hipol, and asked, "Hey. We done yet?"  
Hipol stared at the giant barrier, and said, "Yup. We're done. No metroid can pierce THIS shield!"  
As Hipol ended his statement, he coughed fiercely.  
"Dude, are you okay?" Kruah asked.  
"It's just... there is ONE weakness to this shield that I... KINDA... can't get rid of."  
"What?"  
"If a metroid were to find a way in here, and touch any of these wires here... the shield will disappear."  
"WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA, man! That's... that's a BIG weakness!" Yesty screamed.  
Hipol replied with, "Hey, I'm a smart worker. No need to worry. We'll just... put some plywood over that hole there."  
"HOLE!?" the other two yelled.  
"Did I forget to mention that?"  
Yesty shook his head, and said, "This changes everything. All right, you two; we need to defend ourselves. Kruah, get some plasma rifles; Hipol... shut up. I'll get the plywood."

Yesty boards up the hole in the shield, while Kruah sets everyone up with plasma rifles. Hipol stands and watches.

Minutes of anxious waiting pass before Hipol asked, "Is there anything I CAN do?"  
Kruah answered, "I don't know. .....oh! I got it. Get us a radio; turn it on; we need to keep up with the ongoing war with the hunter back at Command."

So, Hipol gets a radio and turns it on.

"BRRREAKING NEWS! The Evil One, the hunter, is GONE! All survivors are now safe! The Evil One, as well as the Galactic Federation troops invading our home, have gone in the direction of Phaaze! ....then again, that's not ENTIRELY good news. After all, the Great One has retreated to Phaaze to FIGHT the hunter."  
"Thaaat's right, Urt; after all, the end of this war depends on who wins that dramatic battle. Let's just hope that organic body we supplied the captured Aurora Unit with will help in the battle."  
"Wait a minute, Nghi! I just realized-- we haven't told people about that body! That's the first time we've mentioned it! Why not explain it to our listeners?"  
"Alright, Urt. Well, we captured one of the enemy's Aurora Units, and gave it to the Great One to use. We've recently developed an organic body of phazon, or rather, a neck, to upgrade the AU."  
"Whoa! Glad the Great One's on OUR side, huh?"

Kruah and Hipol jump in shock.  
"Dude! The Feds left our planet? We can return!?" Kruah asks.  
The two run back into the ship, and "borrow" it to get back to the Pirate Homeworld.

"....dudes? Where'd ya go?" Yesty notices his ship's gone, ".....YOU SON OF A--"  
A noise is heard. Yesty looks around, and sees the plywood crash open, and metroids pour in.

As Kruah and Hipol fly back, they notice a Class-A Pirate Frigate heading in the direction of SR388.

"Heh.... what an idiot. He's going right for the Feds? Moron," Kruah comments.  
"Yeah. He's probably gonna do something stupid, like fight metroids, or something," Hipol chuckles.  
The two laugh as they fly in the direction of the Homeworld, while listening to the radio.

"Sad news, everyone. We've lost the Great One's vital signs. This can only mean..... she lost against the hunter."  
"And to confirm this theory, there's the hunter's ship now, flying away from Phaaze."  
".....we lost the war...."  
".....we lost our commander...."  
"At least our planet's safe, though."  
"Urt, you always look on the bright side!"  
"Thanks. I try."

And as the two Pirate workers fly home..... the scene changes back to SR388.

Yesty is barely alive, shooting the swarms of metroids away, when suddenly, a Class-A Space Pirate Frigate lands, and a Pirate Commander comes out. He notices the metroids, and shoots the Norfair out of 'em.

"Th..th....thanks, sir," Yesty says.  
The commander looks at him for a moment, then holds his hand forward, and says, "Space Pirate Commander Rlge, how are ya?"  
The two shake hands, and Yesty mentions the two "rogue workers" who stole his ship.  
Rlge thinks long and hard before finally saying, "Let's get 'em."


End file.
